So Much Loveliness

Just wanted to share a picture of some really fun stuff that is happening in my life right now.

From Gratitude to Destitute

I spent the last week in the field checking up on some classroom rehabilitations that were to be started and also join a team to go into an area that we have been unable to work in for almost a year due to security reasons. The first four days of my trip were filled with communities that were sincerely grateful for the support they have been receiving. It was kind of like being Santa. We had to drop off some school supplies but we didn’t have a lot of time because we had to visit 8 schools in two days. So we arrived, took pictures of the construction and then dropped off the boxes of supplies and left town five minutes later. I have never seen anyone so excited about some boxes of chalk before. It was actually really fun. In these communities that we have been working in for a while and have been providing assistance such as food rations or hygiene training have put education at a high priority for their communities. It has been exciting to meet with heads of communities and for them to express how important it is to educate their children. This area of South Darfur has been the most neglected by the government so all the schools in the area have been 100% supported by the communities. That means that school fees are high to feed the teachers, which also means that only a few children out of each family can attend school.

In one of our locations we assisted with the construction of a high secondary school. The school that the students were attending was closed due to security which meant that they could no longer complete their education. So the community decided to move it to a safer location. We assisted with the construction costs while the community provided the labor. I
happened to be at the right place at the right time and was able to participate in the celebration as they moved into their new classrooms for the first time. It was so great to see a group of youth so excited about continuing their education. The other great thing is that the number of girls in the school has already increased from 4 to 7. That’s a big accomplishment in itself.
It’s a rather humbling experience to be the face to the work that we are doing. I know that as I accept the thanks for the work that has been done I realize that there are so many people involved to see this happen and I just get the privilege of seeing it through. The rehabilitation of the basic school classrooms and the construction of the high secondary school both have been projects that I have written the proposals for and am grateful to see them carried out. It’s a strange feeling to play around with words and numbers on the computer and then go to the field and see those numbers reflect in classrooms and children’s education. I really am thankful for what I get to do and I realize what a privileged life I do live.

After I got all pumped up and excited about all the great work that is happening in one area we headed into the area that we have not been able to access for almost a year. The roads were opened up and went in as a team to assess the situation. So as I was very excited about all that is being accomplished, I got a reality check about how much work there still is to do. We
headed into an area where people are still not returning to their villages for fear of attacks. We stopped at a destroyed market where there were a few men sitting selling firewood and charcoal. We were wanted to talk to community members to get a picture of their situation but in order to do that we had to go on a bit of a hike into a nearby wadi to find some families that are living under the trees. This was my first time really talking with people that are living in fear for their lives to the point that they are hiding under trees and collecting firewood so that they can feed their families. This is not the first time these families have fled. They have been moving around for years running away from the fighting and trying to find water. I can’t imagine what that would be like and it breaks my heart to realize that this is the reality of so many in Darfur.

I guess this is a good motivator to try and do more. If it was all gratitude I would forget about the destitute.

10 Wonders in 10 Days

So I think I was a little ambitious this week. My program received funding that needs to be spent by the end of the year so things are really busy. I decided that I really needed to get out to the field and make sure that the communities that we are sending supplies to are ready for them. However, ten days of visiting 14 communities has left me really tired but content with the memories of all the amazing things that I was able to experience. Here are my top ten.


1. 16 hours in two days on a donkey through the mountains north of Nyala. Minus the pain my body experiences I love going on donkey trips. There is no better way to experience the mountains. I was able to enjoy the monkey spotting along the trail, the numerous extended hellos to passers by and even going through the clouds of locusts that we would stir up as we passed under trees. There is plenty of time to sit back and contemplate life, God and the other things that we never seem to find time to do in our busy life.

2. Watching tears and laughter fall across girl’s faces. My latest soap box that I have been standing on when I visit communities is promoting girls education. Most girls start school when they are young but because of family and household responsibilities they are unable to complete their basic education. Many girls get married at 12 and drop out of school. Some communities understand the importance of educating their girls but others are having a more difficult time changing
tradition and realizing the potential of the girls in their community. During one of my soap box moments I looked over and saw a few girls with tears running down their faces as we discussed with them that they need to take charge of their education and delay their marriages to put their education at a higher importance. But it wasn’t all tears as I spent time with the young women in the communities. Many times I found myself in a crowd of giggly girls as I took pictures and videos of them and showed it to them. Their laughter is so contagious and we would get caught up in the laughter and joy of the moment and laugh together without the necessity of the same language or background – just the joy of the moment.

3. Putting in my first hours as a helicopter pilot. On my way to our communities south of Nyala I found myself being the only passenger on the helicopter. I have had a few times where I am the only one getting onto the helicopter at my location but I have never been the only one on my flight. So the pilot allowed me to join them in the cockpit and they taught me how to fly the helicopter. I’m not so sure what I was doing but I didn’t crash and we did make it to our destination. The pilot said that I should take his job and I think I may have to consider his offer.

4. Surviving a stampede of grade 1 children. A lot of the school locations tend to be on the top of a hill or a high point in the community. One school in particular requires a bit of rock climbing to get to the school property. This is normal for the children in this mountain community but is a bit of an obstacle for some of us that grew up in the prairies. So as I was in the midst of descending the small cliff the school released half of the grade 1 class for the day. So then not only was the decent a challenge but doing it without stepping on children just added to the adventure. But we all ended up at the bottom with few injuries and only a couple of fights. We continued in the midst of a crowd of excited children through the streets of the market. As we played, ran and chased each other through the streets the amount of dust the was stirred up by the children and all the activity made it hard to breath. I think we all came out the other side the same color – the color of dust.

5. 7 hours on a horse cart. Due to security reasons and the target that driving our Land Cruisers puts on us, we have resorted to local transport wherever we go. In some areas that means that we hire donkeys but in flatter areas we get to take
horse carts. They are a little more comfortable but still not a luxury form of transport. Because my time in the field is limited I try to see as many locations I can and that lately that means taking uncomfortable transport from sun up to sun down just to get the work done. I have now acquired the nick name from some of the staff of ‘Iron Lady’ because they continue to beg me to rest as they are afraid I will get tired but I keep saying – ‘ok, I will rest after one more community’.

6. Enduring the cold around a small fire with a group of new friends. One of the communities that we stayed overnight in is high up in the mountains and very cold. Ok I am saying very cold because I am in Sudan but I was wearing layers and slept with two blankets. It was cold. The community was so excited for us to stay with them. The house that we stayed in belonged to the cutest little old lady that didn’t stop smiling and giggling the whole time. As we waited for supper a I joined a small group of men under the stars huddled around a small fire. We tried some small talk and listened to the radio but mainly I just enjoyed the beauty of the moment.

7. Sharing the road with a nomadic family. Along
the road while on the horse cart we came across a nomadic family moving all of their goods and livestock. The most amazing part was how the women were traveling. They sit under a tent like structure on a camel to stay out of the sun. It was an amazingly beautiful sight. We discussed with them why I was taking pictures and they invited me to ride with them instead of on the horse cart. I think they even said I could marry one of them so I could travel like a real lady should travel. After 7 hours on a horse cart and a very sore butt I was considering their proposition. It was one of those moments that I was able to breath in and appreciate the opportunity to see this very real part of life that few get to see and enjoy.

8. Being poked and prodded by a group of children. I love how children are so curious and not afraid to discover new things. A few times when I would stop and try to talk to a group of children I would find the kids pulling at my skin and hair just to feel how different it is. Little calloused rough hands would reach through the crowd to feel how this strange white girl felt. From a young age children are engaged in hard work to help out their family take care of the fields and assist in the household duties. Our hands that are mainly used for computer work and are pampered with good soap and lotion become a novelty to these small hard working hands. The kids love to touch and giggle at the difference. All I can do is welcome their curiosity and laugh along with them.

9. Drinking tea, coffee and more tea. Everywhere I would go the community would invite me for at least one cup of tea. Thankfully the cups are small but half of the cup is sugar. It has become a new addiction of mine. Their tea is a fabulous mixture of spices and sugar that becomes a welcome refreshment after hours of traveling. Sometimes they would send us away with chickens, watermelons or tomatoes but my favorite is the tea. Every meal is followed with at least one cup of tea and the morning is started with one cup with milk, one cup without milk and a strong little cup of coffee. In one location I had coffee with so much ginger in it that it left a burning feeling in my throat for hours. Tea breaks and tea conversations are a vital and very enjoyable part of time in the field.

10. Coming home happy, healthy, tired and dirty. After days in the field with limited showers, sleeping in strangers huts and communal eating I am amazed that I have arrived safely and healthy. Illness after being in the field is something that we battle with all the time. Meal times are one or two bowls of local food and everyone digs in with their hands and eats their fill. I really enjoy this way of eating a meal with a group of people but with it comes with the risk of catching whatever illness the rest of the hands in the bowl may be carrying. I am very thankful that after these 10 days I am feeling well and am able to catch up on all the work that remains for me in the office.

I know that hearing these things you are all booking your flights for Darfur as your next holiday destination. I would love to see you all here! It really is a fabulous place.

Objectives of Education

I just thought this was intersting and wanted to share. These are the general objectives for the education system in Sudan.

1) Work towards ingraining religious doctrine as a foundation for upbringing, in individual and collective behaviour according to the guidance of religious teaching (lit, the teaching of the religion) thus forming social, economic and political values applied to individual behaviour based on heavenly teaching.
2) Strengthening patriotism in growing minds and the development of feelings of belief in their country, and the building of love and sacrifice for their country.
3) The building of a self-reliant society and the dawning of hidden spiritual and material powers in the country. The shining out of ambition and the readiness to play our civilising role as a leading country with a message.
4) The development of individual powers and skills, using the opportunities given by modern technology thus equipping individuals for employment according to their abilities for comprehensive development.
5) The development of environmental sensitivity in the foundational stage and showing how the elements of the environment are a gift from God which we should develop and protect and use avoiding drought and desertification and other environmental catastrophes.

Update

I just wanted to put a quick update on where I am and what I have been up to. After I returned from R&R in Kenya we were told that we couldn't go back to Darfur. Becuase of the Muslim holidays things were starting to get insecure and so the UN strongly suggested that organizations 'relocate' their staff out of Nyala. Techinally it wasn't an evacutation because the UN didn't increase the security level to a level 4 (whatever that means) so all but two of our expat team were 'relocated' to Khartoum. So we filled up the guesthouse in Khartoum and rented some hotel rooms to accomidate us all for the past couple of weeks. There are some benefits to Khartoum like AC, great food and fun activities like bowling and swimming that we did to pass the time but all I wanted to do was come home. Right now there is so much work to do with my program because of some new funding that just came through so I had a hard time sitting by a pool and really enjoying it when I knew how much work should be happening. I know it doesn't sound like I was suffering but it was still a challenging time. But I finally was able to come back to Nyala this morning. It's so great to be back. Some things have changed and I'm very amazed at all the insects in my room but it's still home. So now the work begins. 138 classrooms to be built in two months ...... wow I better get back to work.

Desert, Beach, City, Rift Valley and back to the Desert

This has been a week, full of fabulous adventures, friends, conversations and revelations. I was able to head out of Sudan for a week of R&R to relax and somehow get ready to come back and dive back into work again with a clear head and a full heart and stomach. My coworker Erin and I headed out to the coast of Kenya to find a quiet beach to sit on and a beautiful ocean to swim in. We seemed to keep repeating the fact of how wonderful it was to travel with someone and a great friend and travel partner at that. Let me share some of the highlights of the week with you.

We flew into a city called Mombasa and headed up north to a small town called Milindi. Working on a limited budget we tried to do the transport cheep so we could stay in a nicer hotel. It was a great decision in that we had a fun adventure to talk about once we finally arrived in our destination. So we caught a taxi from the airport to the place where the local buses were leaving for Milindi. Just getting on a bus is a adventure of it’s own. There is competition for passengers amongst the buses.
Basically whoever grabs your bags and puts them on their bus first wins. So there is a bit of chaos and a scramble for us as we exited the taxi and find what bus our bags made it to. We squished onto the front seat of the bus with our bags under our feet and headed off for the two hour ride up the coast. Other than the cramped conditions the ride was going well – but then it started to rain. We seemed to find the bus that when it rained outside it also rained inside the vehicle. So after 45 minutes our bags and everything else was wet. So we arrived at a stop along the way and our bus driver felt so bad for us that he moved us into a matatu (small van) to ride in the rest of our way. Even though the matatu was dry it was a bit smaller and our bags seemed to get much bigger. But as soon as all feeling went out of our legs the trip was once again enjoyable. The final vehicle that we used to get to the hotel was a little Tuk Tuk or Rigshaw that splashed through the streets of Milindi to get to our hotel. But we finally arrived to our fancy hotel wet, tired and a little wind blown. Probably not how most of their guests arrive.

We stayed at the Driftwood which is a beautiful quiet hotel run by a British family. The rooms were actually little cottages in the middle of some beautiful gardens. The beach was just past a fabulous dining area and around the pool. Nothing to complain about there. I think we were the happiest guests that they have ever had. The rain continued followed by a huge storm the day that we arrived but we soaked up the coolness and the freshness that goes along with a great storm. We even took a walk down the beach in the rain and laughed as we literally soaked it all up. Every bite of food, every silent moment and every great discussion was relished and breathed in. Those moments are ones that we knew would not last so we enjoyed them to their fullest. The day we tried to find a good swimming place but discovered that the water in the area tends to have a lot of seaweed and rocks in it – not the greatest to swim in. So we decided to head back down to south of Mombasa to another area that was highly recommended. But not before heading out to Milindi town for some great seafood and more adventures.

So after only two nights in Milindi we got back on the bus and headed for Diani. The way back down south was not as simple as the way up. Between Milindi and our new hotel destination we took six different vehicles. After a tuk tuk, bus and another tuk tuk to Mombasa we had to get onto a ferry. You can imagine the confusion as the tuk tuk driver tried to tell us that we
had to haul our bags down to the port and onto the ferry to get to the matatus that could take us to Diani. But we did it. The only white girls in a huge crowd trying to maneuver all our stuff onto a ferry and back into another matatu. All of that adventure helped us decide to stay in a really nice hotel called The Sands at Nomad. After that matatu and another tuk tuk we decided that a little extra pampering may be required. So once again two tired, dirty, smelly, wind blown girls rolled into a fancy hotel trying to act like we belonged there. It was so worth it. The hotel was absolutely amazing. Not only was the service, food and rooms great but the beach was exactly what we had been looking for. It had the whitest of white sand and the ocean was the so refreshing and beautiful. Once again I’m sure the staff loved us because when asked the food or our stay was never just good, it was amazing, or perfect, or so good that words can not express it.

After just a few nights I was off again. From there I left Erin at paradise for a few days as I headed into Nairobi for a few days with a good friend. It was good to go to movies, do some shopping and enjoy a bit of city life. Erin joined me shortly after to help out with the shopping to prepare for heading back to Darfur. However our adventure didn’t stop there. We met up with some SP friends that work in South Sudan and went out to a farm in the Rift Valley. The farm was amazing and the company was great. We got to meet a bunch of great people and get some much needed encouragement all in a beautiful setting. My highlight was lying on some amazing grass (a great novelty to this desert girl) and watching the stars. A bunch of us wrapped up in blankets and forgot about the importance of sleep and counted the shooting stars, listen to the leopards and the bush babies call and talk and laugh all night. It really was an amazing night that will not soon be forgotten. The next morning after a lot of coffee to stay awake we went for a walk through this amazing farm. We walked past a beautiful spring, watched the monkeys and baboons run across our path and climbed the largest fig tree I have ever seen. But sadly we had to leave our new friends and grudgingly get back on the plane and head for Khartoum.

It has been hard wanting to come back. I love my work and I can’t imagine doing anything else but when you compare it to a white sand beach or a starry night in the Rift Valley it’s hard to come back. However once I got back to Khartoum I want to get back home to Nyala. But in true Sudan style our return home has been delayed. Things in Darfur were getting worse when we left a week ago and we put a halt to all road movement for our programs but now there is talk of things escalating further and so the UN has suggested that all NGO move all their non essential staff out of Nyala. So that means that my return home could be delayed for a week or longer until the situation dispels or is played out. So until I return to Nyala and dive back into work I will be dreaming of Kenya.

Good Times

So some people have asked me what I do for fun while here in Darfur. Well I have to admit that there are always enough social events to go around. With such a large expat community here there are dinner parties, birthdays, brunches, sports activities, movie nights, quiz nights and of course the best dance parties around. There is something about dancing all the stress, frustration and anger out of your system at the end of a crazy week. Some of these activities are planned with all the proper permits required when having a large group of people and others are spontaneous gatherings that surprise you with how fun they end up being. But most of the time we have to be creative and find fun in the strangest places. Here are a few pictures that may help you visualize a bit better of the non work aspect of my life here in Darfur.


My first yoga lesson with a fabulous view




Who needs a mirror when you have friends close by




Singing in the truck is a must - especially with the right song



Let the dancing begin.



Don't worry he doesn't always look like this - it's just a part of the finding the fun in Darfur.


Oh the good times in Darfur

Another Great Article

I know my blog has been full of borring articles lately but it's becuase all I have been doing is writing proposals and waiting for funding. Once all that gets worked out I will hopefully be in the field a bit more with some exciting - but not too exciting stories. So as you await the real fun stuff take a read through this really good article from Amnesty International.

DARFUR: ‘WHEN WILL THEY PROTECT US?’
Civilians trapped by violence in Sudan



"No one is fighting for the cause of the internally displaced. They want to go back home, they want to cultivate their land, they want compensation, they want peace and security, this is their priority."


Darfuri from the Masalit ethnic group

Darfur today is a place of violence and terrifying insecurity. With weapons readily available, the population is trapped in a web of armed attacks that grows ever more complex. Paramilitary forces armed by the Sudanese government grow ever stronger while more and more armed opposition groups emerge. Fighting is often between groups – including ethnic groups – formerly on the same side. One thing has not changed: it is still civilians who pay the price.


The UN estimates that 4.2 million people in Darfur rely on humanitarian aid. They include 2.2 million gathered in camps for the displaced.
People are still fleeing. Between January and August 2007, according to UN figures, almost a quarter of a million people fled, some for the third or fourth time.




DANGEROUS FRAGMENTATION
The Sudanese government, faced with a rebellion in 2003, exploited existing tensions to arm militias and forcibly displace hundreds of thousands of people. Since then, the situation has become far more complex.

There are continuing attacks by the Janjawid militias and air attacks by government on civilians or armed groups. There is a heavy government security presence throughout the area. There are also more than 12 armed groups, who fight not only against the government but also against each other. There is fighting between ethnic groups and, within ethnic groups, between clans.

AWASH WITH ARMS


"Because everyone has guns from government and rebels, a small incident leads to disaster."
Darfuri from the Ma’aliya ethnic group

Darfur is awash with arms. When the government armed the Janjawid it equipped them with large quantities of Kalashnikovs, rocket propelled grenades (RPGs), and militarized vehicles. Government paramilitary forces in Darfur are made up largely of Janjawid: they include the Popular Defence Forces (PDF), the Popular Police and the Nomadic Police. The Border Intelligence Guards have been greatly expanded and in Darfur are nearly all former Janjawid.

Armed opposition groups such as the various factions of the Sudan Liberation Army (SLA) and the Justice and Equality Movement (JEM) are also well-armed. Some of their arms were captured from government forces or Janjawid. Some come from across Sudan’s borders, from Libya, Chad and Eritrea.
CIVILIANS UNDER ATTACK


Insecurity on the roads

Large parts of Darfur are now unsafe for travel. According to the UN, in July 2007, 14 humanitarian vehicles were hijacked, 15 convoys were attacked and looted. As a result, UN and aid workers are forced to use helicopters, severely restricting their mobility.

Attacks on humanitarian aid
Nearly every aid agency has suffered armed attacks and nearly every agency has reduced its staff. In July 2007, nine humanitarian centres were attacked and eight aid workers were killed on duty. Some agencies have had to pull out altogether, after government harassment or armed attacks. In December 2006, armed men broke into three aid agency bases in Gereida. One aid worker was raped, another was badly beaten and 12 vehicles were stolen. In July 2007, having failed to obtain credible assurances that attacks would not continue, Oxfam withdrew from Gereida.

Attacks by government and Janjawid forces

In May and June 2007, more than 2,500 people fled from south Darfur, making a painful 10-day trek to the Central African Republic. The refugees said they fled after Janjawid and government forces attacked Daffaq between 12 and 18 May.

The villages of Mazrouk and Um Sa’ouna in south-east Darfur were each attacked by about 300 Janjawid, with vehicles, in August 2007. In Mazrouk two civilians were killed, in Um Sa’ouna about seven. The Janjawid forces were led by a former SLA member and supported by bombing raids by government Antonov airplanes. Such aerial bombardments have been prohibited by UN Security Council Resolution 1591 of 2005.

Sexual violence


"They were raped by any man who wanted. Whenever any man came to them, the women were supposed to comply otherwise they were badly beaten."
Darfuri witness, speaking to UN investigators

Rape and sexual slavery continue to be carried out with complete impunity. On 26 December 2006, Deribat, an SLA stronghold, was attacked by armed men on horses and camels, accompanied by vehicles and aircraft. The people fled to the hills. About 50 women were abducted and taken to a dry river bed where they were surrounded by armed men and systematically raped. Many children watched what happened to their mothers and some were raped themselves. The women were held as sex slaves and also had to cook and serve food for their captors.

Women interviewed by UN human rights investigators were held for about a month; some escaped after an SLA attack. The UN named commanders and members of the PDF in connection with the violence, and Fur men belonging to the SLA/Abu’l-Gasim faction were also said by witnesses to be involved.

Displaced women and girls in camps are vulnerable if they go outside to collect firewood or go to market, and also face rising violence within camps and within their families. Hundreds of rapes were recorded by the UN and NGOs. Three of the women raped were relief workers.

Ethnic conflicts
Hundreds of people have been killed in 2007 in fighting between ethnic groups. As arms have proliferated, disputes that in the past would be resolved by traditional reconciliation processes have led to mass killings.

The fiercest attacks have been by the Northern Rizeigat on the Tarjem. Both groups identify themselves as Arabs, and both groups have provided members of the Janjawid and the PDF. On several occasions in 2007, Northern Rizeigat men, mostly dressed in Border Intelligence uniforms, accompanied by vehicles mounted with RPGs or machine guns, attacked Tarjem villages, burning homes and systematically looting. They shot indiscriminately at the Tarjem. Most of the dead were armed Tarjem villagers fighting back, but old men and those too weak to run also died. According to reliable sources, more than 400 people were killed between January and August.

One of the most recent attacks took place on 31 July during a ceremony to commemorate those killed in a previous attack. The government army was warned the day before that armed men were massing in the area, but took no action. At least 68 people were killed.
Abuses by armed groups

A number of armed opposition groups, including the JEM and the various SLA factions such as SLA/Minawi, have committed abuses including kidnapping, detaining and sometimes killing opponents and attacking humanitarian convoys.

Gereida, 136 km south-east of Nyala, used to be a small town of 12,000 people in an area of Masalit farmers and Fallata cattle-herders. Since 2003, the town has swollen and is surrounded by camps for the displaced containing more than 130,000 people. During 2006, Gereida’s civilians and displaced were left unprotected. The government actually increased insecurity, for instance by obstructing aid workers through a fuel embargo and roadblocks. The 100-strong AMIS force deployed there has failed to provide protection: villagers complain that even when they call AMIS during an attack they seldom help.

After the 2006 peace agreement, the SLA/Minawi controlled the area. They are implicated in summary killings of about 42 people. A number of Masalit men were detained by the SLA/Minawi in September 2006 after an attack on their camp; the bodies of eight of those detained were found in January in a mass grave.

Camps for the displaced


"Look at the camps – there is no security, there are no secondary schools. This generation will be the generation of anger, boys and girls."



Darfur political activist

Within the displaced camps, which are constantly expanding beyond their capacity, there is increasing politicization and militarization. Frustrated young men, bitter against the government of Sudan and mistrustful of outside forces, turn to armed groups.

Leaving the camp is still risky, especially for women, and violence within families is reportedly rising. The camps also come under attack from outside. On many occasions members of Janjawid groups have terrorized camps, kidnapping civilians and demanding cattle and ransom.

On 21 August 2007, after two policemen were killed, hundreds of police, army and Border Intelligence Guards raided Kalma Camp near Nyala, which was sheltering more than 90,000 people. As they entered the camp they beat displaced people with gun butts, looted shelters and arrested some 35 displaced men. The police took the detainees to Nyala, where they were tortured.
ACTION NEEDED NOW

"The NGOs provide food and blankets. They cannot provide security."
A displaced person from Mershing camp


For years the internally displaced have campaigned for a UN force to protect them. At last, three years after the UN Security Council first passed a resolution about Darfur, the Security Council has set up a hybrid AU-UN peacekeeping force of more than 26,000 and the Sudanese government has accepted its arrival.

The force, UNAMID, must be rapidly deployed. It needs to replace the existing AU force, AMIS, by 31 December 2007 and achieve full operational capacity to implement its mandate as soon as possible. That is a daunting task. The government of Sudan has a long track record of accepting interventions under pressure, only to break its promises when the international community looks elsewhere. The work of the AU and UN in Sudan has been consistently hindered by delays in obtaining visas, travel authorizations or import permits. The AU has been hamstrung by not having enough aircraft and by having to gain authorization each time its personnel needed to travel by air. UNAMID must be well resourced and have rules of engagement which reflect its mandate and freedom to move anywhere in Darfur.

In addition to its general mandate to protect civilians, two related areas are vital: the return of displaced people and the protection of women.

The peacekeeping mission should help to ensure safe, voluntary and sustainable return of the displaced to their homes. This needs to include the protection of those returning home and a visible and lasting protective presence in areas after return.
The peacekeeping mission should ensure the protection of women, and other vulnerable groups, from violence, and must formulate a detailed action plan to protect women from gender-based violence. Peacekeepers should work in close co-operation with AU and UN experts, with the participation of women and civil society.

Confused Yet?

Here is a great article that is reflective of what is happening right now here in Darfur. That is not so normal because usually by the time we figure out what is going on things have already changed. I hope this adds a bit more clarity and understanding to this crazy place for you.

By Jeffrey Gettleman

August 28, 2007 (NYALA, Sudan) — Some of the same Arab tribes accused of massacring civilians in the Darfur region of Sudan are now unleashing their considerable firepower against one another in a battle over the spoils of war that is killing hundreds of people and displacing tens of thousands.

In the past several months, the Terjem and the Mahria, heavily armed Arab tribes that United Nations officials said raped and pillaged together as part of the region’s notorious janjaweed militias, have squared off in South Darfur, fighting from pickup trucks and the backs of camels. They are raiding each other’s villages, according to aid workers and the fighters themselves, and scattering Arab tribesmen into the same kinds of displacement camps that still house some of their earlier victims.

United Nations officials said that thousands of gunmen from each side, including some from hundreds of miles away, were pouring into a strategic river valley called Bulbul, while clashes between two other Arab tribes, the Habanniya and the Salamat, were intensifying farther south.

Darfur’s violence has often been characterized as government-backed Arab tribes slaughtering non-Arab tribes, but this new Arab-versus-Arab dimension seems to be a sign of the evolving complexity of the crisis. What started out four years ago in western Sudan as a rebellion and brutal counterinsurgency has cracked wide open into a fluid, chaotic, confusing free-for-all with dozens of armed groups, a spike in banditry and chronic attacks on aid workers.

United Nations officials said tribal and factional fighting was killing more people than the battles between government and rebel forces, which, except in a few areas, have declined considerably.

Though the recent round of clashes between the splintering groups has not come close to taking as many lives as the thousands who were dying each month during the height of the conflict in 2003 and 2004, many aid officials say they fear that the situation is getting out of control.

“The fragmentation of armed groups is among our major concerns,” said Maurizio Giuliano, a spokesman for the United Nations Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs for Sudan. “This is making the situation even more complex, and more difficult for civilians as well as for humanitarians trying to help them.”

The rising insecurity is spelled out in two color-coded maps taped to Mr. Giuliano’s wall in Khartoum, the capital. One is from May 2006 and has only a few pockets of orange and yellow danger zones. But on the map from this June, the danger zones are everywhere.

United Nations officials say the militias may be jockeying for power and trying to seize turf before the long-awaited hybrid force of United Nations and African Union peacekeepers begins to arrive, perhaps later this year. Today’s battlefields are superimposed on yesterday’s, with the Arab militias killing one another over the same burned villages and stingy riverbeds where so much blood has already been spilled.

Though many Western diplomats and a seemingly endless supply of advocates have blamed the Sudanese government for arming Arab militias in the first place, an accusation the government denies, several independent observers in Sudan said the government was not driving this phase of the conflict.

“The government is no longer arming the janjaweed,” said Col. James Oladipo, the African Union commander in Nyala, in South Darfur. The problem now, he said, is “bandits and factions.”

Some aid workers say Darfur is beginning to resemble Somalia, the world’s longest-running showcase for AK-47-fed chaos. Highwaymen in green camouflage — rebel fighters? local militia? janjaweed? — routinely flag down trucks and drag out passengers, robbing the men and sexually assaulting the women. Newly empowered warlords are exacting taxes. The galaxy of rebel armies — the Greater Sudan Liberation Movement, the Popular Forces Troops, the Sudan Democratic Group, to name a few new arrivals — keeps expanding, and ideology seems to fade away. Despite peace talks among them in early August, the rebels, mostly non-Arabs, are now also battling themselves.

Among Arabs, one of the most egregious examples of the recent infighting happened on the morning of July 31 near Sania Daleibah, in southern Darfur. Terjem leaders said hundreds of Terjem had gathered to bury an important sheik. Then they were suddenly surrounded. It was Mahria tribesmen, and according to United Nations reports and witness accounts, the Mahria opened fire with rocket-propelled grenades and belt-fed machine guns and mowed down more than 60 Terjem.

“It was a massacre,” said Mohammed Yacob Ibrahim Abdelrahman, the top Terjem leader. “By our brothers.”

The Arab-Arab violence is impeding the slow recovery process that had begun in some parts of Darfur. Around 2.2 million people are stuck in displaced persons camps, though some had been taking the first steps to leave, like villagers from Jimaiza, north of Nyala, who left their camp in July to go back to plant their peanut fields. They were not worried about Arab militias raiding their village, they said. Those days seemed over. But then the Terjem-Mahria feud erupted.

“It was strange,” said Abakar Ahmed Abdul Rahman, a leader of the Fur tribe, which is non-Arab and the biggest in Darfur. “A few days after the fighting, a Mahria elder came up to me and said: ‘Tell your people not to go back to the camp. They’re safe in the village. We don’t have a problem with you.’ ”

But Mr. Abakar shook his head and laughed.

“I know these people,” he said. “They killed my wife and burned my hut. I’ll never trust them.”

Not all Arab tribes joined the bloodletting when Darfur exploded in 2003. But according to United Nations documents, the Mahria and the Terjem did.

The Mahria are nomadic camel herders from northern Darfur, rugged people of the desert whose militias have helped the Sudanese government patrol the long, sandy border with Chad. The Terjem are farmers and cattle herders who lived closely with the Fur. The Mahria knew how to fight. The Terjem knew where the Fur lived.

Together, the two tribes massacred many Fur villagers, according to United Nations officials and Fur survivors. Then they divvied up Fur land. But the partnership broke down late last year, when, Terjem leaders say, the Mahria kidnapped a 14-year-old Terjem boy. For their part, Mahria leaders say the Terjem started it by stealing Mahria animals, an act that had to be answered.

Juma Dagalow, a Mahria sheik, said that after one ambush in which Terjem gunmen killed many Mahria, he called other sheiks by satellite phone and rallied the troops.

“We went to that funeral to attack them, to finish the account,” the sheik explained, adding that his people were “a little aggressive.”

It was then that the wali stepped in. The wali, or governor, of South Darfur called a peace conference and urged neutral tribes to mediate a cease-fire.

The wali, Ali Mahamoud Mohammed, said in an interview that such clashes were “just a natural part of the life of the tribes” and something he had witnessed growing up in Darfur in the 1970s.

Mr. Ali said the fighting began in December, when the Mahria headed south on a seasonal migration with their camels and trampled through Terjem territory near the Bulbul River. The fighting predictably resumed in July, he said, when the Mahria trampled back.

The governor said he sent troops to Bulbul to quell the fighting. But the Arab-Arab bloodshed, fueled by an overflow of guns in Darfur and a breakdown in the traditional order, seems to be spreading faster than anyone can control. Several tribes have recently fought over land, livestock and the right to extort money along certain trade routes. Among those fighting: Hotiya versus Rizeigat (the Rizeigat are a huge tribe that includes the Mahria); Rizeigat versus Habanniya; Habanniya versus Salamat.

Tribal feuds that used to be reconciled by sheiks before the body count reached into the hundreds are now turning into tribal wars.

And there may be a connection to the rampant banditry, which seems to spare no one — not aid workers, villagers or even Sudanese government officials.

“As these groups split,” said Colonel Oladipo of the African Union, “banditry becomes the source for weapons, money and food in order to sustain their factions.”

The 50 miles of asphalt running between Nyala and the neighboring town of Kas, which cuts straight through a Terjem stronghold, have become bandit boulevard. On a single day in late August, there were six attacks. Traveling by road has become so dangerous in Darfur that the United Nations now uses helicopters to fly even 12 miles.

“There’s absolutely no law and order in this place,” said Annette Rehrl, a spokeswoman for the Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees. The insecurity has driven away some aid workers, United Nations officials said, with 12,300 working in Darfur, 16 percent less than last year.

It has also cemented tens of thousands of Terjem, who traditionally roam with their animals for part of the year, in internally displaced persons camps where they are not free to move. Out here, newly widowed women lie in plastic huts, flies exploring the corners of their eyes. Once proud sheiks have been reduced to carrying sacks of sand on their backs for work. A Terjem baby with a three-inch, bubbly scar at the base of her spine — a recent gunshot wound — howled her head off.

“We just sit here, hating ourselves,” said Mariam Mohammed, a wisp-thin Terjem woman who said her husband had been shot dead in front of her. “Just look at me. I’m half of what I used to be.”

(New York Times)

26,000

So you may have heard that Khartoum has finally agreed to allow UN peacekeeping troops into Darfur early 2008. ‘Finally’ is some of the responses that have been heard while others are saying ‘it’s not time yet’. When is the right time to send in 26,000 peacekeeping troops into a Darfur situation?

When this conflict began and it was being called a genocide, there were clear warring sides. You knew which area belonged to which group and what each side wanted. Now there are around 25 different rebel factions that all seem to want different things. At any point these 25 groups can unify or clash. So who are the bad guys that need to be stopped? Is it Khartoum? But Khartoum has agreed to the terms that the UN is coming in on so you have to know that there are enough loop holes that Khartoum can then continue their strategy. Well then the bad guys are the janjaweed. But who are they and are they really a threat to the civilian population anymore? They seem to be very disgruntled employees that are starting to turn on their employer because of lack of payment for their own people that they lost in someone else’s battle. So are they against what we all like to say is the black African Darfurian’s or are they now against the government? Well that one seems a little grey so then it has to be the rebel groups. So which rebel groups are the problems? The signatories, the non-signatories, the one who’s leader refuses to negotiate, the groups that have a few stolen trucks and satellite phones and call themselves a new rebel group? or is it all of them?

So ok maybe a clear enemy is not going to be defined so then it’s to defend citizens against acts of violence. With what force is allowed? Will it follow the failed AU force that as soon as they see trouble they turn tail and run afraid for their own lives? Are these peacekeeping soldiers ready to risk their lives for the Darfurian women that just need to collect a little firewood outside of the camps? I would like to say yes but I’m not sure that’s the reality. Or does the UN then enter into tribal disputes over cattle raids and issues that have been happening between tribes for thousands of years. The UN can protect the humanitarian agencies as they travel to areas of insecurity. This would open access to many areas that people are suffering because aid can not get through. However, the UN may be seen as an enemy thus creating us as more of a target but with a lot more weapons on our side.

The UN should come in and make our jobs a lot easier by allowing us to drive the roads with much more peace that danger will not be found along the way. But if the UN does become an enemy of any of these groups then we are seen siding with the enemy where before we were standing on neutral ground with wanted assets. So how do we separate ourselves from the work that the UN will be doing? Do we paint our vehicles a different color? Do we not accept convoys from the UN through insecure areas? How will this relationship work?

The general view from the Darfur population is that they are very happy that the UN will come in and bring a long awaited peace. The rest of us are not so certain. I heard one local man question how we could be so skeptical that there will be no peace when a fully equipped UN force is coming with all their equipment and guns. Just what we need, more guns in Darfur – that will solve the problem! Hey maybe I will be surprised and this time next year we will all be holding hands and skipping down the street. But I know that I have 26,000 uncertain questions that will only be answered as time plays out the UNMID scenario.

Is This Really Work?

Like most jobs I have good days and bad days. Sometimes I question why I do what I do and other times I wonder why I would ever want to do anything else. This last weekend was a weekend that I was surprised that I get to be paid for what I do. The plan was to take my first helicopter ride up to our base in the mountains north of Nyala and see as many schools as possible in three days to get numbers of students and to see the conditions of the classrooms.

My first helicopter ride was kid of fun. It flies much lower than an airplane so it was interesting to see all the remnants of burned villages and the nomadic population settlements as we flew over. It’s the middle of the rainy season right now and as we flew from Nyala to the mountains it just seemed to get greener and greener as we went. After we landed and did all our greetings, we dropped off our bags, had a quick meeting then rounded up some donkeys. Abdul (my education guy) and I had the goal of taking a three hour donkey ride out to a small village in the mountains to see their school and see what needs they had for the upcoming school year.

The first three hours of the ride out there were so amazing. It rained off and on which kept things cool and I was blown away by the beauty of this place. It felt like I was riding through a mystical place that only a few people are blessed enough to see. I couldn’t get enough of it. Having this experience on the back of a donkey just added to the romance of it all. It makes you aware of every slope, every puddle and every rock that you encounter along the way. For the most part we followed a small river all through the valley to get to the village. This meant that we had to cross this river about 25 times to get there. So needless to say, with the combination of the rain and the river crossings, I was very wet.



I did fairly well on my first donkey trip. I only fell off once. Well I didn’t really fall, my saddle rolled sideways on the donkey and I realized that I was going to fall off so I jumped. So I did land on my feet so I guess by Sudanese standards that’s not an official donkey fall – I guess this sort of thing happens a lot if they have created definitions for it. The really funny part (because it didn’t happen to me) was when Abdul got off his donkey to help me put the saddle back on and his donkey took off running through a field. So Abdul had to run after it trying to catch it and stop it. I would have taken a video of the whole process but Abdul was a little upset with his donkey so I did feel like taking a video would have been appropriate.

We made it up to this little village and spent about 30 mins there talking with the community leaders and some of the teachers. Then it was back on the donkey for another 3 hour trip back to the base. My legs were pretty much done when I got off my donkey in the village and realized that it was much more difficult to walk than it should be. So the ride back was more about the pain in my legs that I was experiencing than the beauty that surrounded me. But we made it back and days later my legs are still reminding me of my fabulous donkey ride through the mountains.

The next day a whole crew of us headed up a different corridor to do our various jobs. We went with the Water and Sanitation team as well as the Child and Youth protection team. It was a really fun trip with the whole crew. Barring a confusing altercation with a rebel group and a vehicle breakdown in the road, we finally made it to an amazing village that is full of fruit trees. After our meeting with the community and seeing the school and other sites we took a quick hike to an amazing valley full of water springs. On the way back as we walked along with some of the teachers and community leaders, we were given mango’s, orange’s and grapefruits from the orchard owners along the way. One of the owners invited us into his orchard to have our fill of delicious oranges right off the tree. We all ran around the inside of the orchard laughing and dripping with fruit juice. I really get paid to do this stuff?

The following day we visited a few other villages and had long drawn out meetings and discussions with communities about their needs and what we can do about them. Often they are asking for things like health that we can’t provide for them. So a lot of the time is spent explaining why we are limited in what we can offer. In this area due to the insecurity and also because we are one of the few NGO’s that are working in rural communities that are hosting IDP’s we are the only NGO around. Slowly we are recruiting other organizations to help us out but it is a slow process. So we do what we can, explain why we can’t do the rest and hope that someone will come and help us out soon.


The last community that we visited before we headed back to the base was another village full of fruit trees. As we sat down for our meetings, community members brought bags of oranges and guava’s and contributed to this growing pile in the middle of the circle. Here I was reminded what war does to a culture. I believe that all of Sudan was generous like this. Even though they are still very hospitable people I can see a difference in the communities that have been less affected by this conflict. So after our meeting and we were once again sticky with fruit juice we took a trek down to a beautiful waterfall. If there was a waterfall like this in Canada there would be a nice walking path up to it with steps and guard rails so that no one would get hurt. But in Sudan half the adventure was just getting to the waterfall let alone the waterfall itself. But we made it and all the guys that were with us quickly stripped down to their shorts and jumped in the water. There was just me and the protection manager for the girl representatives in the group. So we looked at each other and agreed – lets swim! So in all of our clothing we jumped in the water and enjoyed the moment. These kind of pleasures like water to swim in a fresh fruit off the trees are rare occasions here in Darfur so I soaked up every moment of it. So now when I’m having a frustrating day where trips are cancelled because of fighting on the road or when things just never happen in the time frame I need them to I can close my eyes and get back into the waterfall and remind myself what I great job I do have.

School Days

I can't imagine going to school as a child here in Sudan. Take a moment and think back to elementary school and all the memories that you have about those great years. Things that I remember are things like:
- book reading contests
- the reptiles and other animals that we had in our classroom that we had to feed and take care of
- reccess and playing on the jungle gym
- field trips to the zoo
- sitting in those little wooden desks with one drawer to keep all your pencils and paper in


As I think of all these memories different feelings, smells and thoughts come back to me and it was a sweet fond time of life. One with very little worries and where you are constantly learning and discovering new things. I couldn't help but be reminded of all these blessings as I visited 9 of the schools that we are supporting. This area is a new area that we have never worked in before. Right now the only thing that we are doing in the area is education so it's kind of exciting for me. The last organization supporting these schools lacked the capacity to keep up with it all. So they asked us to step in and take over. Classes in the town of Tulus began at the beginning of July and because of my absense we have been able to start the rehabilitation of the classrooms that needed to be done. So I was shocked at the horrible conditions that the children have to sit through just to get basic education. Even at it's best with the schools supported by us and Unicef, they sit on mats on the floor and have to share one text book for every four kids. There are no libraries, no animals to care for and learn about, no field trip and no jungle gyms to play on. We are doing our best to keep up the needs but all the resources are stretched to the max. Even when we request supplies and books from Unicef we only get about 1/2 of what we need. The teachers that are working in the school often have not been paid for months. This is the job of the government. If we as NGO's start paying the teachers what is going to happen when we leave? So we have to push the government to be responsible to pay their teachers and support the education their children are receiving. But the teachers are under trained and under paid. Often the teachers have only a few years more education than the students that they are teaching. We are working with Unicef to set up trainings for the teachers to help improve the quality of education but it's a struggle.

I don't want to be a downer but it is a huge challenge. There are good things happening too. I was amazed at how supportive the Parent Teacher organizations are to the school. Because of our delay they have done their best to keep the schools running and their children out of the elements so they can focus on their studies. So there are good things happening too but there is a lot of work to be done. I guess that's what keeps me in a job.

Land Cruiser Swimming

Well I made it through my first trip to the field as Education Manager. I went to a location called Tulus. We took over the area from another NGO that had been supporting the schools there. So I went down there to get see the schools as well as look at material costs and to find someone that can build and rehabilitate the schools there. In this one town we are working with eight schools. We will also work in 5 other small towns in the region but their classes won't start for another two months because they are in rural areas. It was good to get out and feel like I'm actually accomplishing something.

The trip there and back was the most interesting I have to say. It took us about 6 hours one way because it is the rainy season. As you can see from my picture that I think we found every bit of mud possible. Other than being really bumpy and long it was lots of fun. We had to cross a couple of big wadi's (seasonal rivers) and that was quite the experience. I never knew a land cruiser could swim. Enjoy the pictures. I'm not really in the mood to write tonight so maybe I'll get to the stories at a later date.

The Greatest Place on Earth

Ok maybe not so much. But I love it anyway. I wanted to post this article not to alarm anyone but rather to continue my struggle to raise awareness of the situation here in Darfur and make people understand that it continues to get worse. It's an article off of Relief Web from OCHA.


(New York: 10 July 2007): Despite repeated appeals from UN agencies and non-governmental organizations (NGOs) operating in Darfur, continuing violence and targeting of civilians have displaced nearly 160,000 people so far this year, pushing the total number of internally displaced people to 2.1 million. Security incidents involving internally displaced people have more than tripled. The total number of civilians requiring relief assistance has reached 4.2 million, or nearly two-thirds of the entire Darfur population.

Particularly worrying is that attacks against the relief community have increased 150% in the past year, threatening the lifeline to this ever-increasing number of displaced and conflictaffected people. In June, one out of every six convoys that left provincial capitals in Darfur was hijacked or ambushed. Since January, some 64 vehicles used by agencies have been hijacked, with 132 staff temporarily detained, often at gunpoint. This kind of lawlessness by armed groups of different political affiliations has forced relief organizations to suspend programming and relocate out of dangerous environments on 15 occasions, temporarily depriving over one million beneficiaries of life-saving assistance

Since the beginning of the year, more than 35 relief convoys have been ambushed and looted, and their precious cargo stolen. Four Darfuris working to help relief agencies undertake projects have been killed. Eleven soldiers from the African Union Mission in the Sudan (AMIS) have also been killed.

“While political and peace-keeping initiatives have made some progress, and bureaucratic obstacles to humanitarian work have decreased, these violent attacks against aid workers are jeopardizing the whole operation,” said John Holmes, United Nations Under-Secretary-General for Humanitarian Affairs and Emergency Relief Coordinator. “All parties have to act now to stop these attacks and bring the perpetrators to justice,” he emphasized.

There are some 13,000 relief workers in Darfur trying to reach a total of four million people with life-saving assistance. As a result of insecurity on the ground, aid workers are forced to rely on expensive helicopter transport to keep operations going in many areas.

“Every day, more people need our help, yet humanitarian colleagues are under increasing threat from all sides,” Mr. Holmes said. “Obviously, we will not give up – the needs are too great. We will continue to adapt operations to ensure that the most vulnerable in Darfur receive at least some relief,” he said. “But what we most need is an effective ceasefire. This is possible – the rebel groups and the government could and should choose now to stop the violence.”

Finally Home

I have finally arrived in Darfur. It really feels like I have come. It's a very strange and comforting feeling - especially because this home feeling only comes in a crazy place like Darfur. Here is something that I wrote along the way - more out of frustration than anything.

"I used to love airplanes and airports but the more I fly the more I dread the trips. Hauling luggage, standing in lines and the hours you spend waiting really takes it's toll. The flights to Khartoum were not so bad this time around. I even got upgraded to business class from Frankfurt to Khartoum. I had to get the guy next to me to show me how to work the seats because I'm used to the one button to recline the seat not the 8 buttons that do all fancy things with the seats in business class. But the flight from Khartoum to Nyala is a whole different story. I was told to be at the airport at 4am for my flight. This was not a big deal since I am up at 2 or 3 in the morning anyway due to jet lag. So I get to the airport and it is raining which menas that instead of waiting outside the building until I can check in we all cram into this waiting areas a nd hope that you can hear when you are allowed to go through the first security check and onto the check-in counter. Finally after 1 1/2 hours I heard something about Nova which is the airline that I am flying on. So I grab my computer, my shoulder bag, my guitar, my huge suitcase ad my smaller suitcase and push my way through the crowd. Sometimes the airport staff take pity on the Kawadja (foreign) women and assist them through the mobs. So one guy grabs my small suitcase and tells me to follow him. So with my two bags, guitar and remaining large suitcase I try to push my way through. For those of you enjoying the Calgary Stampede thing of the throngs of people you have to get through then add on more luggage you can handle and try to make it through. It's not an easy task. So I make it to the x-ray machine and some more nice guys throw my stuff on the belt and I rush around the other side to catch it all before it gets thrown onto the huge pile of bags on the other side. I collect all my things and try to fight my way to the check in counter which always seems to be ther farthest one away.

It doesn't rain very often in Khartoum so the roofs are very rairly sealed which means that there is water dripping from the foor collecting in puddles everywhere on the floor. In most modern buildings in Sudan the floors are tiled with nice smooth marble or something similar which makes them very easy to clean. But it also makes them very slippery when there are puddles of water everywhere. So people are slipping and sliding as they they try to fight the crowds and step over boxes, bags and suitcases trying to get from point A to B. I finally pay the airport tax and get into the mob that is my check in counter. There are no lines or ques here in Sudan. It is every man for themselves and who ever ca get their ticket to the check-in guy first is next in line. So I leave my big bags in a puddle behind me and do the push and shove to get my ticket up front. Finally one guy takes pity on the only Kawadja woman in the midst of all the pushy Sudanese men and puts my ticket in the front of the line. So I thanks him then push my way out of the outstretched arms holding tickets to gather my luggage and lift it over the rest of the luggage waiting to be checked in and on to the scale. Finally I am rid of all that stuff for another couple of hours. One new thing at the airport sice the last time I had been through is that they changed the location of the hand luggage screening and routine pat down that is awlays a pleasure to go through. But someone wasn't thinking becuase the line to go through this security check snakes it's way through the same space where the big pile of luggage is from the initial security screening as well as the mobs that are trying to check in. So a little more pushing, shoving and bumping and I'm through. 2 hours and twenty minutes later I am finaly sitting in the waiting area watching, waiting and again hoping that I can hear when my flight is called. Oh Sudan, oh how I have missed you."

Well I made it all the way through to Nyala with all my luggage and a little bit of my sanity left. It is so sweet to be home. I really have missed this place. It has felt like I have come home. Back to my room and my wonderful bed on the floor. I always sleep so well here so it's good to be sleeping well again. Even though it has only been two months and things in Sudan are slow to change, at the same time so much has changed. There are new international and national staff that I'm getting to know, my little puppy grew into a dog while I was gone, and many of my friends that were here before have all moved on. But some things like insecurity have not changed. We had another vehicle stolen yesterday in the field but they got it stuck in the mud so they covered it with mud and abandoned it. So we did get it back which is very good and a little humorous. When you steal something make sure you have the ability to get it out of the area. It was found only 5 mins from where they stole it.

So there are still a lot of challenges ahead of me and trying to move from finances to education is one of them. But I welcome it all becuase without challenges in life we would never grow and it would just be plain borring

Reflections

So it’s back to Sudan I go. I’m actually writing this on the flight from Toronto to Frankfurt and just felt a little inspired. I have been thinking a bit about the last couple of months away from the dust, the stress and the war zone that I am about to enter back into. It really has been a great couple of months that I don’t think I enjoyed as much as I should have. My first month at home was a hard adjustment. Going from one extreme to another is harder than I like to admit it is. Calgary is this booming city where there is more money than people know what to do with and where life consists of how many toys you can obtain and how you can somehow fulfill your personal goals and aspirations. I have learned how to appreciate this and realize that the options and opportunities that are given to us are not something to be diminished but rather to recognize as a blessing. However, to enter a world of wealth – not just material wealth, from a country that is suffering and is really just making it from day to day. People have challenged me in Sudan in that they suffer themselves but consistently recognize that they are not the only ones going through this trial and try to reach out to those around them and offer themselves unselfishly. I think this is more of a reflection of humans in the midst of suffering more than just Sudanese in the midst of war. But none the less, it is a very different way of thinking and a hard adjustment to see that both situational circumstances of wealth and lack are blessings and have to be accepted and welcomed into our lives.

So in the midst of the suffering I found a wealth of friends, purpose, community and peace. As I returned to the rich Canadian environment I found isolation, boredom, pettiness (in myself), and a huge frustration. But really all it took was a little adjustment. I would like to think that moving from one place to another is easy but once again I realize that I’m not superwoman and I do struggle with things. I feel bad for my family and friends that had to deal with all of this but they did great and I loved every minute that I had with them even if I was grumpy and moody.

Then it was off to New York for what I can say was the best month of my life. It was so great to use all the lingo and acronyms that come out of my month and have people know them or at least have an interest in this humanitarian language that I am using. Then I sat in class for ten hours a day discussing information that I crave that filled a part of my heart that has been craving this kind of feeding. But after a day of discussing humanitarian law, child soldiers, the UN or other uplifting topics such as torture we reflected on our days in a local pub or Thai restaurant. Friendships that are formed in a bubble that deals with these kind of topics happen quickly and are richer than words can express. Weekends were spent trying to take in all the NY sights and the exorbitant entertainment that only a city that doesn’t sleep can offer. Sleep was a rare event but an overload of passion and fun was easy to find.

To see that time end was hard. I have learned to my detriment that I can somehow distance myself well enough that goodbye’s are fairly easy to do. It’s not that I don’t care, it’s just that if I care too much I’m not too sure what to do. But I think it all came back to bite me. Yesterday was a day to cry. I don’t usually get over emotional about things – at least I like to think that I don’t. But for some reason yesterday I woke up and the tears wouldn’t stop flowing. It took me off guard and I’m not too sure what to do with it all. I think it’s a combination of a whole lot. The end of New York, friendship issues that feel unfinished in Calgary, seeing another year of my precious nieces lives pass me by, some personal medical issues left hanging, uncertainty of the crazy life in Darfur ahead of me, the constant question of ‘what the heck am I doing’ in my mind as I head back and the pressure of the big ‘30’ coming up and feeling like I should have more to show for my life are some of the things that seemed so overwhelming yesterday. So I cried, and cried, and cried.

So as I sit here on the plane and reflect I realize the extremes that I have gone through in the last couple of months. They have all had their purpose and I feel richer for have experienced them all. But it’s back to life and all the work that awaits me. It will be great to get back to what I think is normal. I miss my room, my staff, my friends and all the adventures that await me. I wish I could have loved every minute back in Canada a bit more but I know that the time I did soak up will keep me going until the next time.

A Weekend in Central Park

I can't believe that I am already half way through the course. It has been the greatest two weeks ever. Lots of hard work but lots of fun too. So far I am passing the course which is also a great thing. It's been weird to get back into school mode and learning how to learn all over again. It does make me a bit hungry for school again.

I spent most of my weekend in Cental Park. Yesterday a couple of us went down to the big Apple store to check out all the fun Apple stuff. It's quite an amazing store. You go into this big glass room in the middle of the street and go down stairs to enter the store. Then after being tempted to spend lots of money we went for a New York hot dog off a street vendor. Then enjoyed the NY meal in NY style by walking through the park. We ended up walking the whole park which took about five hours. The park is amazing. There is anything you can imagine there. Here are some of the things we saw.




- dogs that look like their owners
- an old man sitting on the bench singing and playing a hermonica
- the central park zoo
- people on a climbing wall
- more dogs
- people running which also includes an ipod
- sunbathers
- basketball
- volleyball
- baseball
- soccer
- tennis
- kickball
- ultimate frizbee
- a naked (or almost naked) indian man doing some sort of show
- more dogs
- horse carriages
- a SWAT team (didn't stick around to see what that was all about)
- and arobat team that did amzing flips and stuff
- a half pipe for BMX bike riders
- a really nice reservoir with turtles and nice birds
- a trumpet player
- more dogs
- some sort of rock band warming up for a concert later in the day
- boating on a little pond thing
- every different kind of person you could imagine
- oh and did I tell you we saw some dogs?

It was quite the walk. I never thought I would see so much in one park. Then we left the park and headed into Harlem to see a different part of New York. It's not the place I would like to get caught in after dark but it was cool to see during the day. Then it was on the train to head to Grand Central Station. I think the name describes it all. From there we decided to walk the streets a bit and find somewhere to eat. We headed towards Times Square and it started to rain. Walking through Times Square is difficult enough to walk through with all the people but then imagine it with everyone holding umbrella's. It was a dangerous place to be. But we made it through with all of our eyes and found a cool little dinner with a big open window. So we had a great meal and got to watch people walk by trying to fight the rain. My biggest contemplation of the day was if it helps a bald guy to not get his head wet if he holds a napkin on his head. Well I think one guy thought it would help him out. Maybe he just got his head polished. Then it was back to campus for a quick nap to prepare for a night out on the town. A big group of us headed down to the meat packing district for a night of dancing. I thought that I saw strange things in central park, I think my evening out trumped that. There is nothing like dancing in a NY club. So much fun. But I did make it back before the sun came up so that was a good thing.

After getting some sleep in a couple of us headed back to Central Park to study for our exam tomorrow. It was a nice day spent on a blanket discussing our past week of topics, drinking Starbucks and enjoying the weather. I think I'm ready for my exam tomorrow and another full week of lectures and paper writing. But not before I get some sushi in my belly.

Sleep? What's that!

So just in case you think that this NY trip is all just a lot of fun and sightseeing, I'll give you the schedule of my day today.

7:00 am - wake up after going to bed at 3:00 am. Ok the 1 - 3 was fun stuff but I really did work until 1

7:30 - 8:30 - breakfast and drinking as much coffee as possible in anticipation for the long day

8:30 - 12:30 - go to UN head quarters to be a part of a celebration conference on Central America's 20 years of peace. It was kind of cool to see Ban Ki-moon (Secretary-General of the UN) with my own eyes. He just stayed for the opening remarks of the conference but it was great to hear him speak in person. And it was his birthday today so I like to think that I went to Ban Ki-moon's birthday party. Then the current president of Costa Rica, Oscar Arias and a firey former President of Guatemala, Vinicio Cerezo Arevalo speak. It was really interesting to hear where Central America is heading and some of the issues they are still battling. It was also just really cool to sit in the UN audience and wear the cool ear peace that you hear the translator through.

12:30 - 2:00 - head back to the campus and eat lunch

2:00 - 3:45 - Learn about the cheery topic of human trifficking

3:45 - 4:00 - more coffee to keep the afternoon sleepies away - why did I stay up until 3 last night?

4:00 - 5:00 - a quick talk from Dr. Cahill about maintaining good health while on the field. Dr. Cahill is the founder of this course and a very well known man in the humanitarian world. Check him out - he's also written lots of books that I should be reading at some point.

5:00 - 6:00 - a nice surprise of learning how to do community health education in South Sudan. It was a nice switch because we usually get really depressing topics like Bio-Terrorism or Child Soldiers, so this was a nice break

6:00 - 7:15 - meet with my group to work on our presentation for Friday. This week we have to answer the question of "When do we as International Humanitarian Organizations, decide that a crisis no longer requires our assistance?"

7:15 - 7:45 - Eat Supper here on campus. They prepare meals for us everyday which is great because we don't have to waste time going out or making something

7:45 - 10:30 - Back meeting with my group and trying to get 8 people to agree on the approach to our answer and how we should present it. Trust me, it's more difficult than it sounds.

10:30 - 12:30 - Head off in smaller groups to do our assigned portion. I get to do a case study on Angola which is actually really interesting.

Currently - well now it's 1:00 am and I still have some reading to do before I can sleep and once again my day tomorrow starts at 7:00 am. But tomorrow I get to learn about International Humanitarian Law, Human Rights Law, and Refugee Law. Wow, I think I'm going to have to drink a lot more coffee tomorrow.